Someone else thought otherwise. She was very determined to get here and very determined that I be her parent. She made it through Norplant, spermacide, and condom. (told you she was determined! She was very unplanned.

My sister had one that was unplanned and she, the daughter found out the hard way that she was not only unplanned but unwanted ~ it still haunts her and she's 20.

I was very ill all during my pregnancy, ended up having an emergency C-Section on October 10th, which was much to my displeasure, she wasn't supposed to be here until the 31st. She was ill and I got to bring her home for two days, then she was readmitted for 10 days. Not only was she ill but she was so ugly that my mom cried when she saw her, cried real tears and not of joy. She'd had almost no amniotic fluid and the entire left side of her face and shoulder were like putty pushed down. *shivers*

I told her how extremely ugly she was and that I'd never in my life seen such an ugly baby. I follow that statement with, "now I wish you'd stayed ugly. With that blonde hair, lovely blue eyes and lovely person inside those eyes, I'm gonna need a big ol stick!"

I told her how unwanted she was, and left nothing out. No, I never once considered abortion, but I sure did not want to be pregnant. Out of the blue, she began talking to me and letting me know, "hey, I'm here and you love me". I read to her, Mom told me I'd give her nitemares reading Stephen King to her, but hey....she didn't kick and scream when I read, she listened. I'd turn on old tunes like the Monkeys, Neil Young, Bob Dylan, Tommy James and the Shondells, stuff like that and we'd rock around the house. I'd swear the child was born knowing the words to those songs especially 'Sweet Cherry Wine'.

The final thing I told her was how our creator knew better than I, what I needed in my life. And, knowing me so well, I got the best sent to me, a beautiful little angel to help me find my way. To show me how to love again. To help me in so many ways. That I believe before we have a child, the "babes" are allowed to 'shop around'. I thank her every day for choosing me to be her mommy, out of all the people in the world who wanted children, she chose me, so that made both of us special. She made it in thru some major obstacles and I got the best little angel ever.

On her birthday she got roses from several people. Before she went to bed the nite of her birthday, she brought me a rose and kissed me. I asked her what it was for and she said, "Without you, I wouldn't have this special day and God was right we need eachother. I love you, Mommy. Goodnite." I cried like a baby. Yes...........our Creator was indeed right. I often wonder who's the mommy and who's the daughter. *smile*

I have learned a lot in these past 11 years and look forward to learning more. I sure do dread the boys, though! Yep, I have a really big stick already, you know what? They're already starting to call! And not 11 year olds either. *groan*